Long-distance is a label that scares a lot of couples as it can be the ultimate challenge that a relationship can face. There have been thousands of couples who have done it successfully for decades and there have also been thousands who have not made it through to the other side.
On April 13, 2019, I was given the news that I would have to move back home to Dubai, which is 4,500 miles away from Sheffield, England, where I had recently gotten into a relationship. By recent, I mean just 11 days before.
Fast forward to October 12, 2020, almost exactly a year and a half later I moved back to Sheffield. We did it! We made it through the painful rollercoaster that is a long-distance relationship.
Here are the top tips that helped my partner and I make it through, long-distance.
1. Communicate
This may be the most generic advice given to any long-distance couple, but it is vital to make things work! Communicate the small things like ‘I’m busy until 3pm today so I may not be able to get back to you for a while’ or ‘hey, I know we have plans to speak at 10 but I’m running late at work’. The small things show that the other person is still a main priority and it helps to stop the distance from feeling bigger than it already is.
2. Plan dates
Remember just because your partner is not physically there to make plans, it doesn’t mean you don’t deserve special moments together. Plan dinner dates and dress up like you normally would, plan movie dates and pick out snacks and watch a movie while on the phone so you can still see/talk to each other! It gives you both something to look forward to.
3. Prioritise time to video call
This is something you can try to be available for every day, it is just like going to work or having classes. Prioritize time for both of you at the end of the day to unwind and talk. Talk about your day, talk about the people you met and what you ate, going into a bit of detail can make your partner feel like they weren’t so far.
4. Try to always plan when you’ll next see each other
This is such an important thing that my partner and I tried to do each time before we left each other after a visit. Knowing when your next ‘hello’ will be can help make the ‘goodbye’ a little less painful. Due to covid, our plans in the last 8 months before I moved back were ruined and that was the longest we went without seeing each other and it was extremely tough because we did not know when the next ‘hello’ was.
5. Build trust
When your person is so far away from you, it is easy to overthink situations and easy to jump to conclusions about things. Try to remember it’s the both of you against the issue and not each other. Be the person you partner can rely on while you rely on your partner. So always be honest and truthful even if it may cause difficult conversations at times because it is knowing that those conversations won’t break you that builds trust.
Have you ever been in a long-distance relationship? Let us know @TheStudentAspect